Red Hair = Firecracker

Seriously, do children come looking any more perfect than this?Chubs is growing up WAY too fast and I'm not always there to see it. So when I see a picture like this, sometimes it stuns me at how much of a little man he is becoming. One thing is for sure, he is turning into one handsome little man.
It's funny when people see his red hair because I've heard many people say, "Oooh, he is a red head. He will be a firecracker." And I think, "Yeah right! My blondie is the firecracker. There is nothing firecracker about this kid." And then I start wondering if he'll change, if he'll be a hard child to raise because he has red hair...which sounds silly because it's a hair color...not a personality trait. But I do wonder. Will he always be this perfect? And I'm serious, he is perfect. Even when he is sick as a dog. Even when he needs some food in his belly. Even when he hasn't napped all day. His cries can ALWAYS be fixed by a snuggle session with mom. He. Is. A. Mommas. Boy.
I dont like the fact that my kids keep getting bigger. I wish they would stay little and let me enjoy them a bit longer...well, I take that back. Petey needs to get out of these terrible twos. She is the sweetest little thing---and also the snottiest. :) But she takes after her mother so I don't really have room to complain.

I'll just leave you staring at this beautiful family picture.

Thank you, Kelsea Elwood. (simplyyouphotoaz.com)

And that's how Suze sees it.

The National Debt

Sometimes I wish life were more simple. I wish for a more hopeful government, a more hopeful job market, a more hopeful life for my children someday. I hope things change. I hope this change comes soon though I know the fixes to America will take so much time that I may not even see the effects in my lifetime. But I still hope.
The liberal view in this world scares me. I dont think you/they/whoever are bad people, I just don't understand you/they/whoever. :) I dont understand why anyone would want more government control. I dont understand why anyone would want more government spending when our debt is so great. Isnt it time we go back to basics? Do we even remember our Founding Fathers? Do we even remember the basic principles that America set it's foundation upon? Or have we just changed for good?
I dont hate our government. I dont hate democrats. We need to unite as a country and fix the situation we are in...the situation that democratics AND republicans put us in. It seems basic in my mind even though I know that these changes are far from a quick fix situation.
The way our world is today reminds me slightly of my life and the changes we've recently made as a family. I have changed so much about my spending habits and the way I view our budget. We no longer spend more than we have or even spend all of what we have. We are learning [slowly] to save and I am learning to be an awesome coupon clipper and sale snagger. :) If our government started living the changes my small family has made, we would have hope for getting out of debt, creating more jobs, and uniting as a whole country. If our president would change his high lifestyle and spend less (like he asks the rest of us to do), America would have an example of what we should be doing to help each other in our many different financial situations.
I believe things can change...I'm just not sure if they will. And most days, I'm just plain scared to find out.

And that's how Suze sees it.

B-B-B-Budget!

Today the Bubs and I are sick. And by the Bubs, I mean Spidey. He is so chubby and the name Bubs just really fits him!

Anyway, like I said, we are sick. Him with a blistered throat, high fever, and swollen gums (he already broke one tooth through! yay!). He. Is. Miserable.

Me? I was vomiting last night and feeling achy today but I have nothing to complain about when my little man is feeling so awful. Right now is the happiest he has been since yesterday. He is still complaining a bit but at least he let me put him down (let's see how far I can get into this post until that changes).

I love my little man so much. He is the happiest kid in the world...when he isnt sick. I cant believe this is the way Petey used to act on a regular basis. Apparently, I just blocked that all out and decided to remember her as an easy baby...which she was anything but!

Last week, I dolled up 2 shirts for my Petey girl. It took my maybe 30 minutes to finished them both and they turned out adorable! I am so happy to have a sewing machine and be able to utilize the fabric and ribbon that I have...since my rule right now is NO buying fabric and ribbon. A good rule to have if you own TONS and TONS of it already. :)

The first shirt I made her is for our family pictures tomorrow with my side of the family.

The second is a cute shirt I made her with the first letter of her name. We (meaning I) are SO into zebra print right now. haha.
I love having the ability to make things cute for my kids on a budget---A budget---I hate budgeting---I'm trying to live a more frugal life---A budget---Trying not to spend money on frivolous things like I have been for the past 3 years---A budget.

You see? That word haunts me in my sleep! I AM trying really hard. You see, if I feel up for it today (and maybe if my mom will watch my kids during nap time), I will be headed over to Fry's to spend approx $30 on a GROCERY budget for one week! It makes me proud! Fry's is having their awesome sales right now and I printed off coupons for lots of the things I'm buying to get them even cheaper! Like Tombstone frozen pizzas for $.50 a pizza! And a free bag of salad and box of Kleenex after coupons! I love this part of my new lifestyle...coupons are fun! The budgeting thing...still slightly haunting me...but we'll make it work out.

And that's how Suze sees it.

The third (and last) Change post

Last night, I made this for dinner...Wanna know how? Is your mouth watering from staring at this picture yet?Well, I went easy on the crust and didn't make it from scratch this time (someday, I'll attempt that). So we started off with this...

...a pre-made crust from Wal-mart. First, I boiled the frozen chicken breasts so they would thaw out enough for me to cut. I then cut them into little squares, approx 1/2in by 1/2in. As the chicken was boiling, I layed the pizza crust on a pan and smothered (I love that word) the top of it with honey BBQ sauce. I then added my cut up chicken and poured some more sauce on top of the chicken. I mixed it all together with my hands (they were clean) and finished our pizza by adding mozzarella cheese on top. I popped it in the oven for 15 minutes and our pizza was ready!

Doesn't it look delicious???

Sidenote: I am going to add some bacon and onions and possibly spinach next time I make it since that is what comes on the BBQ chicken pizza I always order from Papa Johns. :) I'm sure that will add more and make it taste even better. If only my husband liked BBQ chicken pizza...

And that is the end of our change phase! I have started cooking AT HOME, most days FROM SCRATCH. This is something I've never liked. Cooking never interested me but I decided we needed that change for two reasons. 1: Our budget. Eating out is WAY too expensive. 2: Our health. Home cooked food is for the most part 10 times healthier than grabbing a cheeseburger from Inn-n-Out.

Hopefully you will try this recipe out and like it just as much as Petey and I did (and my friend, Esther).

And that's how Suze sees it.

Change Continued

Last Saturday, something in our home changed. I started calling it a home. My wonderful sister watched my kids for 6 hours and I cleaned our house top to bottom. The place has been a disaster since we moved in 2 years ago and I've always blamed it on the fact that both my husband and I work and he is in school. But everything changed when I made the commitment to keep it clean and it has stayed this way for one whole week so far!

(ok, I hadnt put the folded laundry away yet but it has been put away since. :)

And the playroom has never been so clean and organized before! I am so excited to have it this way!

More change to come soon...I know, you're surprised! More change?

Yes, I'm serious. If we are changing at all, we are doing it full force. :)

Change

Changing almost everything about the way you live can be really hard...

...stay tuned for more on this subject (hopefully later tonight).

J-O-B

Today, I was so grateful for my job.

Today, I wanted to quit my job.

Today, I couldn't quit my job...

...so instead, I cried.

Get the picture?

This is a frequent occurence for me. We try and figure out a way for me to stay home more. We fail. We bring it up and try again. We fail again. And yet, when I receive an answer to prayer that I need to be staying home and we finally figure out a possible way...we still cant make it work.

This is where we are.

Any suggestions? Cause all this crying is making my eyes hurt.


And that's how Suze sees it.

Friends

Tonight, I miss my husband. Oh, he is right in the other room but I miss him still. Avatar is not my #1 choice of movies, hence the reason I resort to blogging time (instead of sleeping time). He has been at a bachelor party all night...and as he was gone, I was thinking back to the last time I attended a bachelorette party...I think it is safe to say it was my own (maybe my sister's). Sad...

I know, I know this sounds so "pity party" of me but in all seriousness, having a family changes everything. I love my family. But there are days I just want to call up a friend and say, "You wanna hang out?" and be there 10 minutes later...like I did when I was 10.

I think I even missed my best friend's bachelorette party (kinda how I missed her wedding AND being her bridesmaid)...thanks, bedrest! My beautiful baby girl was born exactly a week after her wedding...one month early...hence the bedrest and missing one of the most important days of her life.

Facebook seems to keep me 'connected' with oh so many friends but do I ever see them? "Best friends" from high school whom I now realize were selfish and always lying or talking behind my back (oh yes, I had many of these types of friends...maybe it's the reason I'm friendless now). I regret high school A LOT, even now 4 years later! I regret choosing the friends I did, ignoring the great people who tried to befriend me and ending up with almost none in the end. I am so grateful that my best friend sticks by me but she lives in a different state! I thought church would provide many new friendships but not many of them do I actually associate with outside of church (seems those friendships were made long before we moved into the ward). I'm just at a loss.

How is it that my husband kept so many friends and I ended up with close to none? What did I do wrong?

I'm slightly confused tonight, slightly sad, very grateful for my family, and very tired..

And that's how Suze sees it.

Squeeze them a little tigher...

Today as I pulled into the parking lot at work, a suddenly remembered that tomorrow is a holiday (since the actual holiday is during the weekend)! You wouldn't believe it if you saw but I started to cry. It was a very happy, emotional cry (thank goodness I am at work 30 minutes before anyone else). I felt like a weight was being lifted for the week. A small weight but nevertheless, a weight. You see, between my work schedule, my husband's work/school schedules, and the kiddos sleep schedules we dont see each other much during the week. It has been so hard giving up my husband and only seeing him for a maybe 30 minutes before we both pass out after our exhausting days. It's hard having to miss the kids all day and I ache---literally ache---to be with them. It's a feeling I never knew one could have---until my beautiful children were born. I am realizing more now of what I couldn't realize back then. This morning, before work, my daughter said, "Mommy I hold you?" (which actually means, 'Mommy, you hold me?") and even though we needed to get ready to go, I did. I held her and we rocked, maybe only for 2 minutes, but it's a 2 minutes I wouldn't trade for the world. My children are so incredibly important to me. I'm sure if you saw my imperfect mothering ways, you may not fully believe that, but though they try my patience, I would never trade them for anything. If I were to pour my feelings out all over this blog every day...it would always end the same. Sure, you're sick of hearing it---I am too---but I want to be home with my children so badly that at times, I just need to type out those feelings.

So if you are a stay at home mommy (or even if you arent) hug your kids a little tighter, show your husband how much you appreciate his hard work, and take some time to breath in your surroundings and realize how much you have.

I try to do more of that every day.

And that's how Suze sees it.