Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Meet my Babies

Meet Petey.Petey was born 17 months ago, in May of 2008. She has the biggest blue eyes I have ever seen and has a firecracker personality.
I had a plan before she was born. She was to be a breast fed, vaginal delivered baby...and nothing in my plan came true. Petey came one month early by c section, weighing 5 lbs even and though I tried to breast feed her, she was losing weight and would not latch on...so she got a bottle and that was the end of it. Her health has been good in the past year and she has no delays so far. She rolled over at 6 weeks, crawled at 6 months and walked at 13 months...all within normal limits of the average child.
Petey now has a brother (yeah my 17 month old is a BIG sister).
Meet Neyo.
(due to not being on my regular computer, you'll have to look at the sidebar to see his picture)
Neyo was born 2 weeks ago at 39 weeks weighing in at 6lbs 6oz and again, my plan was as follows: vaginal delivery and breast fed baby. Again, my plan failed and will forever determine the way I have children (two c sections is two strikes and you cannot try a vaginal delivery again). He started out breast fed and was a CHAMP. But between the nurses giving him a bottle in the nursery, me then trying for two or three hours to get him to latch on, pumping for the next week with great amounts of pain, things changed. Around the time that blood ended up in one of his pumped bottles, I chose to stop. I CHOSE to stop pumping. I was producing less and less and the pain was bothering me far greater than even the pain of my c section. So he is now bottle fed.
A family friend yesterday inquired about my breastfeeding, as I stuck a bottle in my son's mouth. I gave her the run down of my situation to which she replied, "You had better keep pumping so that baby gets breastmilk." Oh ok...I had no idea this wasn't MY decision, lady. I am sorry for stopping but honestly, I think the ultimate decision lies in my hands. And actually, I shouldn't have to be sorry for stopping. For the past week, I have cried numerous times and told my husband I feel selfish for not breastfeeding my child. But why should I feel guilty? I am sure he will still grow up to be a handsome, successful young man and if he didn't, I don't think I would blame it on those formula bottles he was given for the first year of his life.
So here's my opinion. If you want to breastfeed your babies, GREAT! I wanted to breastfeed mine also and am completely not against the idea. But everyone has a decision to make and everyone's bodies are different. I cannot know how you feel and you cannot completely know how I feel.
And that's the way Suze sees it.
Goodnight.

3 comments:

candhterry said...

Good for you!!! You should not feel guilty for standing up for what you believe is best for your child! Your children are so adorable...They're gonna turn out perfect!

Suzanne and Davey Maughan said...

Thanks, Sis Terry. :) That newborn time is rough for my hormones. I tend to get slightly crazy.

kelly said...

It's about you and it's about your baby and sometimes, I feel, if your baby is healthy it's even more about YOU. It's surely a tough call but you know what's best. You're the mama. And another thing - in regards to breastfeeding - the whole topic brings up a ton of emotions for me in relation to my experience. I BF Gwenna exclusively for about 4 days before she wouldn't eat and to make a long story short, we ended up giving her formula and I then BF and formula fed for 3 months and then when my milk dried up I formula fed only... And it worked great for us and she was and is healthy and strong and she grew perfectly... And that was right for us, I know it was. But I got a lot of criticism. This is why I tell you this - as women, we are WAY to critical of each other and that experience and that judgment I felt taught me a lot about how I treat others. So while it was tough, I learned a lot. And that's how KELLY sees it. :)