Sunday, May 11, 2014

Mother's Day 2014

Mother's Day 2014: I was so very much looking forward to this day because I had visions of what a single mother's day would look like. I'd have the attitude equipped to be a patient, loving, and kind mother today. I'd be grateful to be serving my two children because they are the ones who made me a mother in the first place. I'd be strong enough to handle not having a husband who spoiled me on this day.

But the thing is, the minute I got to church, I was reminded of my last mother's day and this triggered a lot of hurt feelings in me. Last year on mother's day, I begged and prayed and begged some more for my husband to come to church---maybe even just to sacrament meeting---to help with our kids. He proposed that they stay home from church with him because that was his idea of helping but I wouldn't allow it. I decided I'd rather go alone with them than have them stay home. It was a hard day. And I've had a lot of hard mother's days in my life. It just hasn't really ever been my favorite.

So I wanted today to be different. I wanted to celebrate the three of us and what motherhood means to our family.

If you're wondering, it didn't go at all how I planned. I lost my patience about three minutes into sacrament meeting. I walked out early because heaven forbid I cry in front of a room full of people (I'm not a public crier). My emotions were all over the place. But why? I wanted to reign it all back in and start over because I wanted to feel like a good mom.

But I realized something from this morning. I realized just how hard I am on myself for these days that don't go perfectly. So I tried really hard to think about the things I do that are good. I wanted to praise myself and write out a list of why I'm a good mother (which was actually a challenge I was supposed to do last month in my Power of Moms group).
So here you go:
  • I am really good at being in tune to my childrens' feelings. When my children are sad or angry, I try to focus on what the problem is and helping them realize it so they can work through it.
  • I love playing with my kids---except board games. I love playing hide-and-seek or tag or just jumping on my bed and feeling carefree with them.
  • I have such a big soft spot for my children and I love bragging when they accomplish new things, big or small. I am their biggest advocate and cheerleader.
  • I am good at capturing moments with my kids. I love taking their pictures and they love seeing their pictures. I'm obsessed with how cute my children are.
  • I would do anything to give my children a good life.
It's really hard to think of the things I do as a mother that are good. I have a hard time seeing my own accomplishments but I am so grateful that my Heavenly Father is patient with me when I fall short and that He sees how much potential I have as a mother.
My life would not be complete without these two. I would do anything for them, even if that means not getting a break on mother's day. Honestly, I get enough breaks from them and I'm glad this day is all about our whole family. I love being their mother. {And seriously, Spidey's face is killing me. That boy. I love him so incredibly much.}

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