Today as I pulled into the parking lot at work, a suddenly remembered that tomorrow is a holiday (since the actual holiday is during the weekend)! You wouldn't believe it if you saw but I started to cry. It was a very happy, emotional cry (thank goodness I am at work 30 minutes before anyone else). I felt like a weight was being lifted for the week. A small weight but nevertheless, a weight. You see, between my work schedule, my husband's work/school schedules, and the kiddos sleep schedules we dont see each other much during the week. It has been so hard giving up my husband and only seeing him for a maybe 30 minutes before we both pass out after our exhausting days. It's hard having to miss the kids all day and I ache---literally ache---to be with them. It's a feeling I never knew one could have---until my beautiful children were born. I am realizing more now of what I couldn't realize back then. This morning, before work, my daughter said, "Mommy I hold you?" (which actually means, 'Mommy, you hold me?") and even though we needed to get ready to go, I did. I held her and we rocked, maybe only for 2 minutes, but it's a 2 minutes I wouldn't trade for the world. My children are so incredibly important to me. I'm sure if you saw my imperfect mothering ways, you may not fully believe that, but though they try my patience, I would never trade them for anything. If I were to pour my feelings out all over this blog every day...it would always end the same. Sure, you're sick of hearing it---I am too---but I want to be home with my children so badly that at times, I just need to type out those feelings.
So if you are a stay at home mommy (or even if you arent) hug your kids a little tighter, show your husband how much you appreciate his hard work, and take some time to breath in your surroundings and realize how much you have.
I try to do more of that every day.
And that's how Suze sees it.
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