Thursday, May 3, 2012

Faith before fear

In true Suze fashion, I could not wait two whole weeks before showing you  at least a sneak peek of the beautiful birthday photo session I had with my almost 4 year old.
She is just so beautiful and believe it or not, this is not my favorite photo from that day. It's definitely up there on the list.
I thought the dress I sewed all by myself would make the pictures perfect but really, it's the little girl in the dress that makes everything perfect. She is true beauty, inside and out.
I don't know how I got so lucky.
I often wonder how our lives are going to pan out, where we will be living, what career choices our family will make, and whether I will be the best mother I can be for my children.
Last night I read this blog post and it made me realize that I do lack something huge in my life. Faith.
I have so many fears that I cannot seem to overcome. The fear of being lonely, of losing a loved one, of not having a successful life, of not being a good mother, of not being liked by others, etc. I definitely don't lack in the fear department but I often lack enough faith to overcome my fears. There are nights I cannot stop the tears because I worry about the future instead of living in the present.
After reading that post, I made a goal to have less fear and more faith.
My fears really do break me down but having faith can make me whole again. The future is not as important as today.
As the day gets closer and closer to that little 3 year old becoming a 4 year old, I realize it has gone by too quickly and I have missed too much of it. I may be with her every day but what I really need to do is to be with her every day; to be present in the moments, teach her, love her, focus on her, watch her grow, and make sure she knows that she is more important than any computer task, chore around the house, or place we plan to go. She is more important.
I have faith that I can make that happen.

And that's how Suze sees it.


The Purple Lady said...

I feel so blessed to have helped you on your way to realizing what is most important. I pray your faith will grow from a seed into a tree of life--giving strength to you and your family. <3

Alida said...

May your faith continue to grow!