Today, I was crying.
Today, I was crying AND driving.
Today, I had way too many overwhelming moments.
Today, my PCOS kicked my butt. I hope it doesn't do that tomorrow.
The cramps were horrible, the hormones were even worse.
But today, I lived. I shared memories. I breathed. And I even smiled.
Today was good.
Hard but good.
As I was driving today, I thought about the many times this week that people have stressed how important health is with PCOS. I thought about how my diet has to change and how I need to get on a better exercise routine. And then I thought about what God must be feeling. I wonder if he is up there saying, "Suzanne! I gave you a good body. Please keep it healthy! It is special."
It is special. I am special.
I've had family members express their amazement when they see me passing up a cookie or soda (A lot of these have been expressed by my proud husband). I've been asked how I seem to be doing it pretty easily. Well, honestly, I am doing it because I feel I have to. This isnt just about me looking fat or skinny anymore. It is about how long I will live, how many children I will be able to have, and hopefully, it'll keep me from getting diabetes. (please, please, please, please, please!)
So I'm doing what I can to keep my quality of life the best I can make it. And hopefully, soon down the road, it will help me conceive and bring another healthy baby into this world. But for now, I am staying busy with the two that I have. :)
And that's how Suze sees it.
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