Back to School Wreath

My sister in law and I got together on Monday to craft up some more cute things! This time, we decided to make a cute Back to School wreath that she found on The Polkadot Chair.

The only part we finished was the actual ruler part. I added some ribbon after she left and immediately hung it up as is. (Remember, I'm impatient.)

This morning, I had a great idea to add a felt apple. I made a felt flower with some red beads in the middle and then added the felt green stem.

Well, tonight, I've finished more of it! I was at the store when I walked past some colored pencils on sale for $.97. I knew they would go with my theme so I bought a pack, came home, and hot glued them onto the wreath. I am loving the way it looks. The colored pencils added just enough color.

I havent decided if I am done or if Ill add anything else to it. :) What do you think?

And that's how Suze crafts.

A Slew of Cuteness

Right before my old laptop was completely unusable, I made a positive cd for myself to listen to in the car.
Song #1 on the cd is 'Firework' by Katy Perry. My favorite quote right now from that song is, "If you only knew what the future holds, after a hurricane comes a rainbow." It gave me chills the first time I really heard that phrase today. It feels weird to be standing in the middle of my own personal hurricane and to try to comprehend how much my life is now changing. But I am so sure that a rainbow is nearby and I have faith that everything is supposed to happen this way.

Anyway, happy things have been happening this week and I wanted to document the cuteness that has been happening left and right. :) We went to Tucson over the weekend to see Boss' parents' new house. Oh my goodness, gorgeous! Sweet Spidey curled up in the 10ft caterpillar and watched a movie on Saturday with Papa {one of his favorite things to do}.

Petey chose to bean bag. :)

I captured this adorable picture of the kids Sunday afternoon.

Monday morning, my little weirdo son decided it would be fun to make as much of a mess with cereal as can be done. "sigh" What am I gonna do with him?

Have you seen a more precious face?

She isnt too young to do dishes yet, is she? :)

And the most recent photo, Petey put this Walmart sticker on her eye tonight and thought it was the funniest thing.

How much more entertaining could life get? I'm pretty darn happy with the most important people in my life. They are truly so special to me and I am such a lucky woman!

And that's how Suze sees it.

Dealing

Right now, I'm dealing with a lot. At first, I thought it was too much but that was until I remembered God will not give me more than I can handle (1st Corinthians 10:13). So now, I'm trying to sort through everything and deal with it in my own way.
In the past couple of days, I've felt like people have looked at me and been confused as to why I'm grieving any of this. Because my youngest isnt even two. Although it's mostly personal, I'll try to somewhat explain the way I'm feeling.
I am ready for a baby. Five months ago, I was ready. That mixed with my impatient personality makes it hard to deal with the fact that I cannot just physically choose to have a baby right now. I had one person actually say, "Why are you even trying to have a baby right now? Your son is still so small." I understand that he is young but coupled with the fact that it takes 9 months to get the next baby into this world, I am just ready. There is not much I can explain that would help you understand exactly how I am feeling but it is a enormous amount of heart ache.
In the middle of playing games with my in laws last night, I was suddenly overcome with sadness. Everybody thought I was upset about the game but I can assure you, that was the least of my worries. I just get sad sometimes. I cant predict when it'll come on or what will trigger it but many things are sensitive to me right now. I apologize to the many of you that have to deal with that and see me lately.
We looked at pictures yesterday as we were trying to get everything moved from one computer to the next (which hasnt happened yet) and I saw a picture of Spidey in the sling. I started to cry because I miss that.
So I'm dealing. Between my blog, Twitter and Facebook, I write about my emotions and try to sort through them as they come. This sugar/gluten/lactose detox has been hard because I am reminded every meal about the changes I am having to make. My husband is my greatest cheerleader and keeps me going. I keep trying to talk myself out of the detox for one reason or another and he somehow keeps me on track. I don't think I could do this without him.

BUT...if you think I'm selfish for not just appreciating the two children I do have, I promise I do. This diagnosis has brought such a closeness to our family. I don't think Boss and I have really fought in a week (petty arguments don't count :). And I stare at my kids and wonder how I got so lucky. Everybody whom I've talked to with PCOS {and doctors} have been so surprised that we have gotten pregnant twice with no issues. I realize how much of a blessing my two children are. And with that, comes a lot more bragging about them on my blog. As if I dont already do that enough. :)
A day or two after my diagnosis, I was having a hard afternoon and Boss was gone to school. The kids followed me out back while I was cleaning and asked to jump on the trampoline. Then Petey asked for me to turn the hose on. Normally, I would say no---too much effort to dry them off, bathe them again, etc---but that day, I said yes. Because there is just nothing more enjoyable than hearing your children squeal with delight.

Especially when you spray them in the face.

And they kept coming back for more.

As I watched them run around, soaking wet on the trampoline, I wondered how many times Ive missed out on moments like this because the easiest answer was "no".

When we came inside and everybody was cleaned off, the kids were goofing off on the couch.

Spidey decided I needed a mini heart attack so he stood on the arm of the couch and jumped. "sigh" My daredevil boy.

Then, Petey and I were both cracking up because Spidey was trying to put her shorts on...

And he fell over. Luckily, he fell straight on a pillow or we may not have been laughing.

I realize that my diagnosis has helped me to not take my kids for granted. I am grateful for that eye opener. Just wish I could take the rest of this away.

But here I sit, just dealing. Sometimes happily, sometimes grieving, but always dealing.

And that's how Suze sees it.

Open Gym

My sister's sister in law told us about this open gym for little kids every Friday that costs $7, but it's bring 1 kid, get the 2nd kid free. My sis and I decided we would split the cost (since I wanted a mommy/daughter dat with Petey) and it only cost us $3.50 each! I was so excited to go, since Petey literally asks me once a week if she can take gymnastics. A couple weeks ago, I bought a cute leotard for Petey, since she is starting dance in a two weeks. She asks to wear it almost every day and I finally let her wear it to open gym. She was so happy! I also wanted to document the fact that her hair is perfect that day. After the episodes where Petey broke a lot of her front hair off, I've been trying to find ways to keep it back but still cute. I think we will be doing this hairstyle a lot. And her hair curled perfectly that day. Really, I just love her curls! The first thing that attracted Petey at the gym was the foam pit. She had a worker help her jump in. I thought she would get nervous once she had jumped in but she LOVED it and crawled around for a while. Her next thing to try were these rings. She seriously would hang on them and have me swing her for a couple minutes. I kept asking if her hands were tired and she would calmly say, "No, I like it."Petey's favorite thing {which took me by huge surprise} was holding onto this rope and having the worker swing her into the foam pit. I thought she'd get scared or at least, forget to let go but every single time, she let go at the perfect time and dropped into the pit. I was so proud!

She swung into the foam pit on that rope probably 12 times. It was her favorite thing.
She tried the balance beam a couple of times and got about halfway across before falling off. Good thing, it was one inch from the floor.

I got one picture of K Bear...proof! He was there. :) He loved these shorter rings and played with them for along time.

And of course, another big hit with Petey was the trampoline. She can jump SO high!

We had such a fun time and will probably be back again this week. You cant beat $3.50 for an hour and a half of fun {and then a tired kid for the rest of the afternoon}.

And that's how Suze sees it.

Fresh and {not} Easy

Today, our computer broke. I woke up to sign on and the screen was cracked. Halfway through the day, it had bled throughout the computer screen.
Boss thinks Miss Petey stepped on it, which is highly likely.
I was bummed about it all day and stressed about buying a new computer. We talked about getting a desktop and not a laptop this time and I was sad. I LOVE having a laptop, where I can veg on the couch and watch Hulu shows at night.
But dont worry, thanks to Best Buy's end of summer deals, we found a laptop within price range. Whoohoo!
Now all I have to do is figure this darn new computer out. It's set up a lot different than the old one and I dont have any pictures on here yet.
We are headed to Tucson in the morning so I wont really have time to blog til Sunday or Monday.
Adio,s my peeps. This has probably been the most boring blog post youve ever read. And for that, I am sorry.

And that's how Suze sees it.

PCOS

On Tuesday, I made our family blog private. This was due to a very hard diagnosis I was given that day and I wanted a safe place to write down all of my feelings.
It's only been 36 hours but I'd like to share a portion of that private entry with you. I know it is long but trust me, this was only a small portion.
"Today was a sad day. After 2 months of not having a period and doctor's trying to figure out why that is, I was diagnosed with Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS).
Last week when the doctor called to tell me they were suspecting this, I cried. I cried throughout this whole week. So when they actually confirmed that it is PCOS, I was surprised when no tears came.
The nurse, Linda, explained some things about what we would be dealing with, the biggest being that I would have to take fertility drugs if I wanted to get pregnant. Unfortunatly, that was one of the biggest reasons we had come to the doctor's office. We have been trying to get pregnant for 5 months now and when my period stopped coming, I was extremely excited that we would be welcoming another little one into this world. I took 3 pregnancy tests before contacting the doctor and starting this whole process. In my heart, I hoped that the answer was pregnancy and not a problem with my body.
But I was wrong.
It hit me hard the day my labs came back and Linda talked about PCOS. I was trying to listen and focus and all of a sudden, I heard her say, "fertility drugs". My heart stopped. This couldn't really be happening to me. Me, who gets pregnant the very first month every time we try to have a baby {until now}. This didn't make any sense to me. My body does pregnancy really well. My last pregnancy was as perfect and routine as they come. How could this have happened?
Linda didn't have an answer to that last question. She said it happens to women and they don't know what causes it. It doesn't matter if you've had 8 kids, it can happen at any time. But once you are diagnosed, it doesn't go away."

I have really mixed emotions about this entire thing. There are so many life changes coming my way and I am extremely overwhelmed (Boss's appendectomy didn't help either.). I am so grateful for the two children I have been so easily blessed with. That is mainly the reason I wrote that gratitude post yesterday. I don't want to whine and complain about this but honestly, it is a big deal! It is my life. Whether I already have children or not should not make it so that I am not allowed to be upset about what my body is going through.

I dont like the word infertility. I have never wanted that word associated with my body. Honestly, it's something I've always been afraid of. Always. And now it's happening.

I wrote down some more information on my private blog about the PCOS that hopefully will help to keep me healthy. I had no idea that having this would affect anything other than my ability to conceive a child. But unfortunatly, there is a lot more to it.

"One thing I am going to try is something my sister's friend, Angie, told me. She also has PCOS and knows much more about it than I do. She explained that because our blood sugar is now messed up (kind of like a diabetic), to regulate my system I should find out if it has become hard for my body to break down certain foods. She went on a sugar/lactose/wheat free detox and then slowly built each of those food groups back into her diet, to see whether she had an intolerance to any of them. I know it sounds silly but cutting those things out of my diet is going to be super hard. Like super SUPER hard. But Ill give it a try if it's going to help regulate my hormones and maybe even help us get pregnant.

Really, I just want to be pregnant...like yesterday. I know I'm being selfish and I have some more time before there is a huge gap between my kids but I'm scared for how many more times it'll be possible for me to get pregnant and part of me just wants to be pregnant right now to reassure me that it can still happen after being diagnosed with PCOS. "

I'm scared. I'm truly, truly scared because I wasn't quite ready to be delt such a challenge. I know we'll overcome it and I believe we have more children coming our way. I'm just really scared.

I haven't decided whether I'll keep posting about my PCOS here or start a new blog that focuses on it more. Right now, I'm just kind of overwhelmved with it all and trying to figure out as much as I can.

And that's how Suze sees it.

Watcha Searchin'?

My friend, Jenna, over at Mom, the Intern recently posted about the things people search online that have taken them to her blog. I know I've posted about this once before but there are so many new ones when I checked this time and I just had to share them.


1. Potty training: Ok, ok, I get this one. I've talked about potty training my daughter A LOT. She still has accidents and she is over 3 yrs old now. "sigh"

2. Tulle wreath: Yes, I've made a tulle wreath before. Yes, I love it. If you'd like to make one too, just look at my old posts and you'll find it!

3. How to make a tulle christmas wreath: Ok, same as the above search.


4. My daddy put me in the corner: Ok, first of all, who is searching this on the internet? Second of all, when have I said this on my blog. WEIRD! Funny, but super weird!

5. Amanda Dickson, do get your hopes up: Umm...who's Amanda Dickson and why does she need to get her hopes up? And why the heck did that search bring someone to MY blog?

6. Christmas tulle wreath: Wow, that wreath was apparently popular.

7. Cork screw bow pictures: Yes, I did put pictures of my cork screw bows on here. Glad it helped whoever searched this.

8. Corner cribs: Umm, yes, our crib is in the corner of the room. I hope my blog helped you find what you were searching for.

9. Cute 2nd birthday girl outfits: Ahh, yes, that one time I blogged about making Petey her 2nd birthday shirt. Happy birthday to your 2 yr old, searcher!

10. Gymnastic training: Umm...I dont think my blog is what you were looking for when typing in that search. Sorry I've mentioned that word on my blog, therefore probably wasting your time.

Oh, people are so silly. I hope you had a good laugh. And if you'd like to find out what people are typing in and finding your blog, go to your dashboard and click "stats". Then click "Traffic Sources" and scroll down. Good luck!

And that's how Suze sees it.

Gratitude

Tonight, I need to be grateful. I've complained enough for the day and I need to write down how blessed I actually am. Let's start right here, shall we? This boy keeps me going when I'm ready to quit. He is full of laughter and silly faces. He is so determined to grow up even faster than my first baby and as much as I want him to stay little, I think his determination will get him far in life.

Then there's my firstborn. Nobody could ever take her place in my heart. Some days, I just want to hold on tight and never let go of her. She is always asking me if I'm ok and showering me with hugs and kisses.
And of course, my best friend in the entire world. This man is always by my side, supporting me and caring for me. Even today, as he should be mostly laying on the couch after surgery, he keeps jumping up to help me with things! He has been the best choice I've made in this life and I sometimes lose sight of that.

Together, we make up the most perfect little family. Why is it that I lose sight of the blessings I have? Even through these rough times, they are still mine forever and we are so blessed to have each other.

And that's how Suze sees it.

PS: A couple weeks ago, I talked about my family blog and how I wasnt really writing on it anymore. Well, I decided to make it completely private so that I could have it for a personal journal. So you wont even be able to get on there and look at the old archives anymore. But Ill still be posting on Suze's Corner as often as possible. :) Thanks for following!

Boss Appendectomy

On Sunday morning, I was woken up at 2am by my husband crawling into bed and complaining of stomach pains. Being the caring mean wife that I am, I asked him what the problem was rolled over and fell back asleep. Yes, people, I am the worst wife ever. But it doesn't stop there.
I got up for church at 7am and tried to wake up Boss, who told me he would not be going to church because his stomach was hurting so bad. I then proceeded to yell at the poor guy for being a wuss and not wanting to get out of bed for church.
Petey and I went to part of sacrament meeting and then I felt like I needed to go home and check on Boss. When we got home, he was laying on the couch and I gave him an ultimatum. He could either get up and go to the rest of church with me or I was taking him to the hospital.
I called my dad to ask him a couple of questions about the pain and he wanted to take a look at Boss so we headed to my parents.
After checking it out, my dad sent us to Banner Gateway to get a ct scan. Luckily, my kids were already dressed for church so they went with my parents. Here's Boss being rolled in for his ct scan.
After the blood results and ct scan came back, the doctor told us that a regular appendix should be 5cm and Boss' was 9cm. He was in the early stages of appendicitis and would need an appendectomy that day.
Awesome...
The surgeon came in and talked us through all of it {the whole while, Boss turning whiter and whiter} and then my dad and Jp came and gave Boss a blessing. We said goodbye and they wheeled him back to the OR.

It took about 30 minutes but I had to wait for him to wake up from the anesthesia so I got to see him about 2 hours later.

Boss was feeling nauseas for a while after the surgery and fell back asleep right around the time that his parents arrived from Tucson. He slept the entire time they came to visit him and he felt horrible when he woke up and they were gone.

We got to leave the hospital yesterday morning and have just been taking it easy at home.

So many people have helped us throughout this crazy weekend and we are so grateful for all of you. We have meals being brought in, people watching the kids, and so many people inquiring on how Boss is feeling.

And that's how Suze sees it.

PS: Huge shout out that I love Banner Gateway! The whole process took less than 4 hours before they had Boss in surgery. We didnt have a single bad nurse or doctor.

Big Boy Milestones

A year ago, if someone had told me what I'd be doing today, I probably wouldn't believe them.
But alas, our lives have just gotten crazier.
I will give my husband's appendectomy it's own post later but for now, I wanted to post about the big toddler boy in our family.He's just adorable, isn't he? And that isn't me being biased, I hear it all the time from family, friends and strangers. He just has SO much personality. I wish I could take a video of him throughout a day and just post it for you to get to know him better. Trust me, you'd love it. :)

Lately, Spidey likes to rub his food on his face and in his hair. Talk about annoying and cute all wrapped into one. It doesnt even have to be a food that'd normally make a mess...he will find a way to grind it into his hair.

Spidey surprised me the other day by stacking sixteen blocks, without them falling over. Of course, he knocked them over a minute later but oh well. :) I couldn't believe how steady his little hands were when he was stacking them all. His concentration is a lot of times better than Petey's. He can play hide and seek better than any other 22 month old I've ever met.

Though this picture doesn't really show it, Spidey also learned how to do a somersault the other day. Again, I couldn't believe it. How could my tiny baby be doing all of this new, big boy things?

The last thing our big boy has learned recently was something he has been working on for quite some time. He learned to jump off the ground with two feet. Petey does this constantly throughout the day and Spidey would try and mimick what she was doing. It was actually adorable to see him trying tso hard to do something that to us, seems so simple.

But as you can see by both of his feet leaving the ground in the above picture, his determined little self finally succeeded.

I'm so proud of my little toddler boy. He is such a cutie patootie and has quite a personality for someone so small (and trust me if you've never met him, he is certainly small...poor guy).

And that's how Suze sees it.

For my Big Girl

It's been a couple of days since I've posted because I just havent felt like it. We've had some wonderful moments this week but also some pretty dark moments. And since they are very private moments, I havent felt like writing in here...because that's what personal journals are for.

But alas, here I am. I hope you've missed me, at least just a tiny bit.
Today I mourn and rejoice for my firstborn baby. This week, I have very clearly realized that she is no longer a baby. Not even one bit. This crazy haired little girl has a mind of her own but has so many moments where she still wants to be close to her mommy. I wouldn't trade her personality for any others.

A couple weeks ago on our way home from Carlsbad, I looked back and noticed that she had something in her mouth. When I asked her to give it to me, I realized it was a ball of hair. She had chewed off her bangs! I was disgusted and we had a long talk about why we dont do that.

Then a few days ago, she ran over to me and said, "Mom, I was twisting the comb in my hair and it got stuck." I know it doesnt look that bad but it was wrapped many times and I couldn't even find the ends of her hair. It took Boss about 45 minutes to get it undone. The whole time, I was worried we would have to cut her hair really short but he finally got it out. Now she just has a bunch of shorter hairs in the front because it broke a lot of her hair off. "sigh"

Two days ago, our big girl had her first real playdate with her friend from church. She's come home a couple of times from church and said, "Mom, why do I only get to see 'A' at church? I want to play with her at home." So A's mom and I decided to set something up for them.

They played so well together for 2.5 hours at our house.

and then they headed to A's house for another 2.5 hour playdate.

After dropping them off at A's house, I realized that she is a big girl now. She isn't a baby and she doesnt do baby things. She does big girl things, like have a playdate without mom there to supervise.

I felt like I had let a little bit more of her go. It seems with each milestone she hits, a little bit more of her is her own person and not the baby that I make choices for. Each time she gets a little bit older, she gets a little more independent.

And I mourn and rejoice that. Because in many ways, it is very happy and in other ways, it makes me sad.

And that's how Suze sees it.

Repurposed: Jeans into Skirt

My name is Suzanne and I am a Pinterest addict.
Phew, so glad I finally admitted that.
I signed up for Pinterest 3 days ago and have been it's newest addict since then.
One of my first "re-pins" was for a cute little skirt over on Mary Janes and Galoshes. I immediately thought of a pair of pants Petey had gotten holes in on our recent trip to Carlsbad.

So last night, I got brave and started following her tutorial. I took the very cute pair of jeans (they are actually "jeggings" and Petey hasnt even completely grown into them...so you can understand how sad I was when she got a hole in the bum)...

And I cut the jeans right below the pockets.

I didnt take pictures of the next part but you can find it on the tutorial above. I cut two strips of fabric, one of them was 4 inches and one of them was 6 inches, and hemmed one long side of each.

I then sewed the two pieces of fabric together on the non-hemmed side. I was going to attempt my first ruffle but it didnt work out. Maybe I didnt make a big enough stitch but when I tried to pull one of the threads, it didnt budge. I was pretty bummed but decided I'd try a different approach.

So I pinned little tiny pleats around the raw edge.

Then, I pinned the fabric to the cut off jeans and slowly sewed around the whole thing, being careful to take the pins out as I went.

And there you have it! I think it turned out adorable.

And Miss Petey agrees. She was so happy when she saw it on the couch waiting for her this morning.

And that's how Suze sews it.